Tag Archives: emotional

So…

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Tomorrow is D-Day.  And I would be lying if I didn’t say that part of me thinks there’s a chance this really worked.  I’ve tried hard to be realistic about the chances of this working, but I am human.  And my heart is in it.  And I want it really bad.  I had a crazy wave of nausea tonight, and I remember that happening with my son.  Of course, it could have been anything.  It could have been the unholy stench practically growing off of my child’s feet.  Maybe I was dehydrated.  Maybe I was hungry.  Maybe it was a side effect of the PIO.  But, it’s hard not to think everything means something when you are in The Waiting.

I did, however, today manage to go all day without thinking about the fact that tomorrow is D-Day.  I kept busy at work, and it wasn’t until I was leaving and realized I needed to let people know I would be in late tomorrow because I have a doctor’s appointment, that I remembered.  Right.  Tomorrow.  9DP 5DT.

 

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I’m emotional. Not sure why…maybe it’s just PMS. But I am feeling kind of hollow and needy and that’s just not like me. I’ve also been feeling pretty isolated lately and I haven’t quite figured out what to do with that. I want to be more social, but when? If I am going to run, cook, be a photographer, be a mom, be a wife, carry a full time job….when do I have time to just be and hang out with friends?

Meh – I am just having one of those times where I want to just disappear for a while. This will pass, I’m sure.

 

(Originally posted in LJ)