During the past year, I have had many requests from potential photography clients to do maternity sessions.  I have referred every one of them to other photographers.  I haven’t been able to do a maternity session since my miscarriage last February.   I have photographed lots and lots of newborns, that doesn’t seem to be an issue for me.  But I just can’t do maternity.  I can’t really look at pregnant women at all – I’m sure that one day it will be better, perhaps once I know how my own journey will end and I make peace with all of this.

It has bothered me tremendously that my business is suffering because of my inability to heal and move forward.  Today I hit a moment of truth.  I will have to do a maternity session in the coming months.  One of my long term clients is pregnant, and they will want a maternity session.  They’ve been with me for 2 years – and are such amazing, kind and funny people.  I cannot turn them away or refer them to someone else.  And while I have come to know them over the past two years, I would not explain my situation to them.  I see that as unprofessional.  And, why should a client have to deal with the emotional baggage of the people they hire to work with?

So, I have to start preparing myself for this and I’m really not sure how to do that.  Do I make myself look at pregnant women in public instead of looking the other direction?  Do I scan through maternity photo sessions on photography websites?  Do I look back at the pictures of myself when I was pregnant with my son?   I guess I need to figure it out or learn how to bite my tongue and bite back the tears and power through.

Of course, this is still a few months away and a lot can happen between now and then, but I guess I just want to be prepared.

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